Saturday, November 27, 2010
Sunday, November 14, 2010
Dear Coach Meyer...
I have seen a brain-damaged dog in its old age take less time than Steve Addazio to figure out that a certain approach to things simply does not work.
That dog also did a much better job of marking his territory.
3 losses in a row at the Swamp is something that has not happened since before the Swamp was given its name (ironically, by the very coach who handed you that third loss). The losses themselves are bad enough, and are made all the more unacceptable by the fact that the two most recent losses were against teams that are vastly inferior in terms of talent. But to only manage two offensive scores total in the losses against those two teams while fielding an offensive two deep full of players that were heavily recruited by other perennial national championship contenders is so beyond the pale that I cannot begin to describe the level of disgust I am feeling at the sheer ineptitude of this offense.
Coach Meyer, you have built up a lot of good will with the Gator Nation because of everything you've done. And no one is going to go 13-1 and compete for a national title every single year. We get that.
But college football is constantly changing. Defenders get faster, stronger, and nastier with each passing year, and defensive coordinators find new and innovative ways to use that speed, strength, and nastiness to make life miserable for opposing offenses. That means offensive players have to get faster, stronger, and nastier as well, and the coaches must constantly adapt game plans to allow them to remain competitive. More importantly, coaches must adapt a plan of attack that caters to the strengths of the available offensive personnel!!!
That simply did not happen this year (truth be told, it didn't happen last year either, but having the greatest player in college history for a quarterback went a long way towards masking that). And if Steve Addazio remains offensive coordinator next year, no one in Gator Nation who has been paying attention will believe that commitment to maintaining a competitive edge (and the winning that goes along with it) is your number one priority going forward. And once people stop believing that, you will find that the good will you have built up will evaporate very quickly.
Don't let your friendship with Steve Addazio destroy what you have built here. Please, do not allow him to be a part of the offensive game plan ever again.
And if you have time, maybe you can replace D.J. Durkin as well. There is no excuse for a linebacking corps with such obvious talent to under-perform so grossly.
Addazio first, though. We're not going to let you get away with retaining him. Please accept that. We look forward to many more years of Gator dominance with you at the helm. Really, we mean that. Please don't let us down.
Sincerely,
The Gator Nation
That dog also did a much better job of marking his territory.
3 losses in a row at the Swamp is something that has not happened since before the Swamp was given its name (ironically, by the very coach who handed you that third loss). The losses themselves are bad enough, and are made all the more unacceptable by the fact that the two most recent losses were against teams that are vastly inferior in terms of talent. But to only manage two offensive scores total in the losses against those two teams while fielding an offensive two deep full of players that were heavily recruited by other perennial national championship contenders is so beyond the pale that I cannot begin to describe the level of disgust I am feeling at the sheer ineptitude of this offense.
Coach Meyer, you have built up a lot of good will with the Gator Nation because of everything you've done. And no one is going to go 13-1 and compete for a national title every single year. We get that.
But college football is constantly changing. Defenders get faster, stronger, and nastier with each passing year, and defensive coordinators find new and innovative ways to use that speed, strength, and nastiness to make life miserable for opposing offenses. That means offensive players have to get faster, stronger, and nastier as well, and the coaches must constantly adapt game plans to allow them to remain competitive. More importantly, coaches must adapt a plan of attack that caters to the strengths of the available offensive personnel!!!
That simply did not happen this year (truth be told, it didn't happen last year either, but having the greatest player in college history for a quarterback went a long way towards masking that). And if Steve Addazio remains offensive coordinator next year, no one in Gator Nation who has been paying attention will believe that commitment to maintaining a competitive edge (and the winning that goes along with it) is your number one priority going forward. And once people stop believing that, you will find that the good will you have built up will evaporate very quickly.
Don't let your friendship with Steve Addazio destroy what you have built here. Please, do not allow him to be a part of the offensive game plan ever again.
And if you have time, maybe you can replace D.J. Durkin as well. There is no excuse for a linebacking corps with such obvious talent to under-perform so grossly.
Addazio first, though. We're not going to let you get away with retaining him. Please accept that. We look forward to many more years of Gator dominance with you at the helm. Really, we mean that. Please don't let us down.
Sincerely,
The Gator Nation
Monday, November 1, 2010
Week 9 nominations
Dabo Swinney, Clemson
Two days after regaining control over their own fate and coming off back-to-back wins where the Tigers looked good, Clemson mailed it in against one of if not the worst team in the ACC, losing 16-10 to BC and were not even able to manage a single TD on offense. Their lone scores, both in the first quarter, came on a pick-6 and a FG. BC scored 13 in the second quarter and no one scored the rest of the game.
Randy Shannon, Miami
Speaking of losses to ACC bottom dwellers, BC was not the only team to get its first conference win Saturday as UVA held on for a 24-19 win over Miami. The 'canes scored 19 in the 4th quarter but couldn't erase a 24-0 deficit. Jacory Harris or no Jacory Harris, going down 24-0 to UVA is inexcusable.
Mack Brown, Texas
After calling out his assistant coaches and players for a sense of entitlement and a lack of effort in practice, I'm sure Mack Brown expected the team to come together and try to salvage the season with a win over upstart Baylor. Alas for the 'horns, it is now time to hit the panic button and start retooling for next year.
Butch Jones, Cincinnati
A year ago, Cincy was in a BCS bowl game and a top 10 team. Now they're getting blown out by Syracuse and at 3-5 likely won't be in any bowl game.
Brian Kelly, Notre Dame
Speaking of Cincy... the Brian Kelly era seems to be going as bad as the Charlie Weis era did. First there's the loss to Tulsa but much more important than that is the tragedy that occurred under Kelly's watch at practice last week. How does he allow a videographer to be filming practice on a tower in 50mph winds? That shows no common sense or forethought and it is just a horrible situation. Our thoughts and prayers go out to the family of Declan Sullivan and we just hope that this tragedy will prevent a similar situation from ever happening again.
Danny Hope, Purdue
Automatic under the Out-Zooked clause.
Steve Sarkisian, Washington
The Huskies and Jake Locker have hit rock bottom with a 41-0 blowout loss to Stanford. Surefire #1 pick my ass -- 7/14 for 64 yards and 2 INT. That's why Mel Kiper and Todd McShay should never be listened to.
Two days after regaining control over their own fate and coming off back-to-back wins where the Tigers looked good, Clemson mailed it in against one of if not the worst team in the ACC, losing 16-10 to BC and were not even able to manage a single TD on offense. Their lone scores, both in the first quarter, came on a pick-6 and a FG. BC scored 13 in the second quarter and no one scored the rest of the game.
Randy Shannon, Miami
Speaking of losses to ACC bottom dwellers, BC was not the only team to get its first conference win Saturday as UVA held on for a 24-19 win over Miami. The 'canes scored 19 in the 4th quarter but couldn't erase a 24-0 deficit. Jacory Harris or no Jacory Harris, going down 24-0 to UVA is inexcusable.
Mack Brown, Texas
After calling out his assistant coaches and players for a sense of entitlement and a lack of effort in practice, I'm sure Mack Brown expected the team to come together and try to salvage the season with a win over upstart Baylor. Alas for the 'horns, it is now time to hit the panic button and start retooling for next year.
Butch Jones, Cincinnati
A year ago, Cincy was in a BCS bowl game and a top 10 team. Now they're getting blown out by Syracuse and at 3-5 likely won't be in any bowl game.
Brian Kelly, Notre Dame
Speaking of Cincy... the Brian Kelly era seems to be going as bad as the Charlie Weis era did. First there's the loss to Tulsa but much more important than that is the tragedy that occurred under Kelly's watch at practice last week. How does he allow a videographer to be filming practice on a tower in 50mph winds? That shows no common sense or forethought and it is just a horrible situation. Our thoughts and prayers go out to the family of Declan Sullivan and we just hope that this tragedy will prevent a similar situation from ever happening again.
Danny Hope, Purdue
Automatic under the Out-Zooked clause.
Steve Sarkisian, Washington
The Huskies and Jake Locker have hit rock bottom with a 41-0 blowout loss to Stanford. Surefire #1 pick my ass -- 7/14 for 64 yards and 2 INT. That's why Mel Kiper and Todd McShay should never be listened to.
Week 8 winners
Co-winners:
Bill Stewart, West Virginia: 8 points, automatic under the Jeff Bowden clause
Bill Lynch, Indiana: 8 points, automatic under the Out-Zooked clause
Runner-up:
Mack Brown, Texas: 4 points
Honorable Mention (1 point each):
Butch Davis, UNC
Dan Hawkins, Colorado
Randy Edsall, Connecticut
Kirk Ferentz, Iowa
Bill Stewart, West Virginia: 8 points, automatic under the Jeff Bowden clause
Bill Lynch, Indiana: 8 points, automatic under the Out-Zooked clause
Runner-up:
Mack Brown, Texas: 4 points
Honorable Mention (1 point each):
Butch Davis, UNC
Dan Hawkins, Colorado
Randy Edsall, Connecticut
Kirk Ferentz, Iowa
Sunday, October 31, 2010
Creativity
I found this gem on Facebook. Yes, we had a brand new 'up-tempo' offense for Georgia to try to defend (which they did). I am sure all of you remembered how we all easily predicted each play call and misuse of players' talents. This was a repeat of Vandy 2005, and I am not sure this team deserved to win this game. They did everything possible to give the win to UGa.
Wednesday, October 27, 2010
Midseason Zook Awards
We have reached the midpoint in the regular season and so without further ado, its time to check the Zook Awards standings and season-to-date summary and hand out some awards and bonus points! Note that these do not include the yet-to-be-released week 8 awards.
Overall Midseason Point Standings
Total number of nominations in parenthesis
Urban Meyer & Steve Addazio, Florida, 39 points (5)
Houston Nutt, Ole Miss, 20 points (3)
Tim Brewster, Minnesota, 19 points (3)
Turner Gill, Kansas, 18 points (4)
Les Miles, LSU, 13 points (3)
Frank Beamer, VA Tech, 11 points (1)
Butch Davis, UNC, 10 points (1)
Joe Paterno, Penn State, 10 points (1)
Rich Rodriguez, Michigan, 10 points (1)
Mike Locksley, New Mexico, 9 points (3)
Danny Hope, Purdue, 8 points (1)
Derek Dooley, Tennessee, 7 points (4)
Lane Kiffin, USC, 6 points (3)
Paul Hewitt, GA Tech, 4 points (1)
Doc Holliday, Marshall, 4 points (1)
Mack Brown, Texas, 3 points (1)
Rick Neuheisel, UCLA, 2 points (2)
Mark Richt, Georgia, 2 points (2)
Ron Zook, Illinois, 2 points (2)
Jimbo Fisher, FSU, 1 point (1)
Dan Hawkins, Colorado, 1 point (1)
Randy Shannon, Miami, 1 point (1)
Jeff Tedford, Cal, 1 point (1)
Midseason Awards
As you can see, Urban Meyer & Steve Addazio are way out in front of the pack thanks to 3 straight wins in weeks 5, 6, and 7. However we feel that there are some coaches who also deserve an extra bit of recognition:
First coach fired award: Tim Brewster, Minnesota. Brewster earned a well-deserved and overdue pink slip, the first coaching casualty of the season. Not only was he fired but he was sent packing immediately a la Tommy Bowden and offensive coordinator Jeff Horton will take over for the rest of the season. 10 bonus points.
Next on the chopping block award: Mike Locksley, New Mexico. The former Zook protege has somehow escaped an actual win so far this season, probably due in large part to the fact that no one pays any attention to New Mexico football. The Lobos are 117th of 120 with 13.6 points per game for and dead last with 44.1 points per game against. Locksley's career highlights include 1 win in 19 tries, a 1 game suspension for punching out an assistant, and 1 sexual harrassment lawsuit. 10 bonus points.
We're going to bolt for a new conference and leave our coach behind award: Dan Hawkins, Colorado, who no one expects to ever coach a game in the Big XII. If Locksley is next on the chopping block, Hawkins will follow soon after. 5 bonus points.
We forgot you were still there award: Paul Wulff, Washington State, proud owner of a 4-28 (1-21 PAC 10) record in his 2 1/2 seasons in Pullman. Wazzu is 1-6 this season with a 1 point win over Montana State. 10 bonus points.
Mad Hatter clock management award: We decided the award itself needed to be named after Les Miles. Lucky for him he has that Satanic contract so we only award 5 bonus points.
Worst analogy ever award: Derek Dooley, Tennessee, for comparing his team to the German army in World War II, awaiting the allied D-Day invasion. I'm sure Tennessee fans greatly appreciated being compared to Nazis. 5 bonus points.
These midseason awards will be tacked onto the season standings. Now onto the week-by-week summary.
Week by week
Preseason: Butch Davis (10); Rich Rodriguez (10); Lane Kiffin (4); Houston Nutt, Les Miles, Derek Dooley (1)
Week 1: Houston Nutt (11); Turner Gill (10); Mike Locksley (4); Urban Meyer & Steve Addazio, Ron Zook (1)
Week 2: Frank Beamer (11); Paul Hewitt (4); Doc Holliday (4); Jimbo Fisher, Lane Kiffin, Dan Hawkins, Tim Brewster, Rick Neuheisel (1)
Week 3: Houston Nutt (8); Turner Gill (3); Urban Meyer & Steve Addazio (3); Jeff Tedford (1)
Week 4: Danny Hope (8); Tim Brewster (8); Mack Brown (3); Mike Locksley, Derek Dooley, Mark Richt (1)
Week 5: Urban Meyer & Steve Addazio (12); Les Miles (11); Derek Dooley (4); Mark Richt, Turner Gill, Lane Kiffin, Ron Zook (1)
Week 6: Urban Meyer & Steve Addazio (11); Joe Paterno (10); Mike Locksley (4); Les Miles, Randy Shannon, Rick Neuheisel, Derek Dooley (1)
Week 7: Urban Meyer & Steve Addazio (12); Tim Brewster (10); Turner Gill, Kansas (4)
Overall Midseason Point Standings
Total number of nominations in parenthesis
Urban Meyer & Steve Addazio, Florida, 39 points (5)
Houston Nutt, Ole Miss, 20 points (3)
Tim Brewster, Minnesota, 19 points (3)
Turner Gill, Kansas, 18 points (4)
Les Miles, LSU, 13 points (3)
Frank Beamer, VA Tech, 11 points (1)
Butch Davis, UNC, 10 points (1)
Joe Paterno, Penn State, 10 points (1)
Rich Rodriguez, Michigan, 10 points (1)
Mike Locksley, New Mexico, 9 points (3)
Danny Hope, Purdue, 8 points (1)
Derek Dooley, Tennessee, 7 points (4)
Lane Kiffin, USC, 6 points (3)
Paul Hewitt, GA Tech, 4 points (1)
Doc Holliday, Marshall, 4 points (1)
Mack Brown, Texas, 3 points (1)
Rick Neuheisel, UCLA, 2 points (2)
Mark Richt, Georgia, 2 points (2)
Ron Zook, Illinois, 2 points (2)
Jimbo Fisher, FSU, 1 point (1)
Dan Hawkins, Colorado, 1 point (1)
Randy Shannon, Miami, 1 point (1)
Jeff Tedford, Cal, 1 point (1)
Midseason Awards
As you can see, Urban Meyer & Steve Addazio are way out in front of the pack thanks to 3 straight wins in weeks 5, 6, and 7. However we feel that there are some coaches who also deserve an extra bit of recognition:
First coach fired award: Tim Brewster, Minnesota. Brewster earned a well-deserved and overdue pink slip, the first coaching casualty of the season. Not only was he fired but he was sent packing immediately a la Tommy Bowden and offensive coordinator Jeff Horton will take over for the rest of the season. 10 bonus points.
Next on the chopping block award: Mike Locksley, New Mexico. The former Zook protege has somehow escaped an actual win so far this season, probably due in large part to the fact that no one pays any attention to New Mexico football. The Lobos are 117th of 120 with 13.6 points per game for and dead last with 44.1 points per game against. Locksley's career highlights include 1 win in 19 tries, a 1 game suspension for punching out an assistant, and 1 sexual harrassment lawsuit. 10 bonus points.
We're going to bolt for a new conference and leave our coach behind award: Dan Hawkins, Colorado, who no one expects to ever coach a game in the Big XII. If Locksley is next on the chopping block, Hawkins will follow soon after. 5 bonus points.
We forgot you were still there award: Paul Wulff, Washington State, proud owner of a 4-28 (1-21 PAC 10) record in his 2 1/2 seasons in Pullman. Wazzu is 1-6 this season with a 1 point win over Montana State. 10 bonus points.
Mad Hatter clock management award: We decided the award itself needed to be named after Les Miles. Lucky for him he has that Satanic contract so we only award 5 bonus points.
Worst analogy ever award: Derek Dooley, Tennessee, for comparing his team to the German army in World War II, awaiting the allied D-Day invasion. I'm sure Tennessee fans greatly appreciated being compared to Nazis. 5 bonus points.
These midseason awards will be tacked onto the season standings. Now onto the week-by-week summary.
Week by week
Preseason: Butch Davis (10); Rich Rodriguez (10); Lane Kiffin (4); Houston Nutt, Les Miles, Derek Dooley (1)
Week 1: Houston Nutt (11); Turner Gill (10); Mike Locksley (4); Urban Meyer & Steve Addazio, Ron Zook (1)
Week 2: Frank Beamer (11); Paul Hewitt (4); Doc Holliday (4); Jimbo Fisher, Lane Kiffin, Dan Hawkins, Tim Brewster, Rick Neuheisel (1)
Week 3: Houston Nutt (8); Turner Gill (3); Urban Meyer & Steve Addazio (3); Jeff Tedford (1)
Week 4: Danny Hope (8); Tim Brewster (8); Mack Brown (3); Mike Locksley, Derek Dooley, Mark Richt (1)
Week 5: Urban Meyer & Steve Addazio (12); Les Miles (11); Derek Dooley (4); Mark Richt, Turner Gill, Lane Kiffin, Ron Zook (1)
Week 6: Urban Meyer & Steve Addazio (11); Joe Paterno (10); Mike Locksley (4); Les Miles, Randy Shannon, Rick Neuheisel, Derek Dooley (1)
Week 7: Urban Meyer & Steve Addazio (12); Tim Brewster (10); Turner Gill, Kansas (4)
Monday, October 25, 2010
Week 8 nominations
Butch Davis, UNC - Allowed Miami to reel off 30 straight points in a 33-10 win. Maybe he excused his players from the game early to attend a party in South Beach?
Mack Brown, Texas - Iowa State? Really? The same team OU just beat 52-0 a week ago? Looks like a very impressive 9 year streak of 10+ wins a year is coming to an end. This marks the first back-to-back home losses for Texas since 1997. At least they don't have Steve Addazio as their OC though.
Dan Hawkins, Colorado - Blew a 10 point second half lead against Texas Tech. Plus we haven't given him quite the attention he deserves in this, presumably his last season.
Bill Stewart, West Virginia - Automatic under the Jeff Bowden clause. Losing to Syracuse is embarrassing. Losing to Syracuse at home when you score 14 points in the first quarter and hold Syracuse scoreless in the 2nd half? The only word I can think of to describe that is Zookworthy.
Randy Edsall, Connecticut - Weren't the Huskies a popular preseason pick to win the Big Easy? Instead they're 3-4 (0-2) having just gotten shut out 26-0 by Louisville. On the other hand, congratulations to Coach Strong who is doing a great job in his first season!
Bill Lynch, Indiana - Automatic under the Out-Zooked clause. How do you get blown out by Illinois? Pathetic!
Kirk Ferentz, Iowa - He must have read "How to Manage the Game Clock" by L. Miles and U. Meyer before the game.
Mack Brown, Texas - Iowa State? Really? The same team OU just beat 52-0 a week ago? Looks like a very impressive 9 year streak of 10+ wins a year is coming to an end. This marks the first back-to-back home losses for Texas since 1997. At least they don't have Steve Addazio as their OC though.
Dan Hawkins, Colorado - Blew a 10 point second half lead against Texas Tech. Plus we haven't given him quite the attention he deserves in this, presumably his last season.
Bill Stewart, West Virginia - Automatic under the Jeff Bowden clause. Losing to Syracuse is embarrassing. Losing to Syracuse at home when you score 14 points in the first quarter and hold Syracuse scoreless in the 2nd half? The only word I can think of to describe that is Zookworthy.
Randy Edsall, Connecticut - Weren't the Huskies a popular preseason pick to win the Big Easy? Instead they're 3-4 (0-2) having just gotten shut out 26-0 by Louisville. On the other hand, congratulations to Coach Strong who is doing a great job in his first season!
Bill Lynch, Indiana - Automatic under the Out-Zooked clause. How do you get blown out by Illinois? Pathetic!
Kirk Ferentz, Iowa - He must have read "How to Manage the Game Clock" by L. Miles and U. Meyer before the game.
Week 7 winners
Co-winners:
Urban Meyer & Steve Addazio, Florida, 12 points (including a bonus point for winning the poll and a postgame press conference bonus).
Tim Brewster, Minnesota, 10 points. Automatic under the Mississippi State clause.
Runner-up: Turner Gill, Kansas, 4 points
Urban Meyer & Steve Addazio, Florida, 12 points (including a bonus point for winning the poll and a postgame press conference bonus).
Tim Brewster, Minnesota, 10 points. Automatic under the Mississippi State clause.
Runner-up: Turner Gill, Kansas, 4 points
Thursday, October 21, 2010
Week 7 postgame press conference bonus
We haven't seen press conferences this bad in Gainesville since 2004. Steve Addazio definitely gets a bonus point in the Zook Awards for a press conference bonus. Watch if you dare. Disclaimer: You will feel dumber for having watched this.
I will hopefully have time for a further analysis later -- first things first I need to step up my campaign to become Floirda's new OC and work on my playbook -- but what I will write will mirror the excellent analysis over at firesteveaddazio.com so click on the link and check it out.
I will hopefully have time for a further analysis later -- first things first I need to step up my campaign to become Floirda's new OC and work on my playbook -- but what I will write will mirror the excellent analysis over at firesteveaddazio.com so click on the link and check it out.
Sunday, October 17, 2010
Week 7 nominations
Let's start with the "other nominees" this week before getting to the main course because there is a lot to write about that.
Tim Brewster, Minnesota
Automatic under the Mississippi St. clause (more to come on Miss St. later too). Brewster got the axe on Sunday after losing to Purdue. Congratulations Minnesota and good luck in your coaching search!
Turner Gill, Kansas
Year 1 for Turner Gill has been ugly so far but wow, 59-7?
That's about it - there really wasn't a lot of bad coaching going on this week. There were some upsets sure - Texas beat Nebraska but that was certainly not a total shocker - neither was Wisconsin beating Nebraska. UK beating S. Carolina was somewhat surprising until you remember the Chicken Curse which manifested itself in the form of an injury to Lattimore and a terrible pass (on a great playcall) by Garcia at the end. None of these is really Zookworthy. However...
Urban Meyer & Steve Addazio, Florida
After a recruiting trip to PA to get a plan B in case Tim Tebow (who spent the day with Mike Shula) didn't come to UF, Urban Meyer and Greg Mattison sat on a plane in 5 degree weather on a tarmac in the middle of nowhere in PA. "He [Mattison] said, 'You realize if we don't get Tim Tebow, that will set the program back 10 years,'" said Meyer. "I said, 'Shut up.' He said, '10 years.' I got so upset with him, I grabbed a blanket and didn't talk to him the rest of the trip."
Urban Meyer was 48-7 with Tim Tebow. He is now 13-6 without him. Think about that for a second. Steve Spurrier never lost to an unranked team at home in 12 seasons. Urban Meyer has now lost to 3 in the last 4 years.
Once again the playcalling was anemic. We gained 14 yards on 12 first down plays in the first half, putting ourselves constantly in 2nd and 3rd and long situations. For the 6th time in 7 games this season, we failed to score in the 1st quarter. For the 2nd time since pre-Spurrier (Auburn 2007), we got shut out in the first half. For the 2nd time in 3 games, we got held to 7 points or less and the first time at home since a blowout loss to unranked LSU in the first year of the dark ages. On 14 of our first 21 first downs, we ran a read option dive play. The last 7 first downs we actually threw the ball because we were behind.
There were at least 4 or 5 plays where I went "oh shit" in the stands because I could see what play we were running and I could see that Miss St. also saw what play they were running. Every "oh shit" ended up in a loss or at best a no-gain on a play that the defense had sniffed out. It was shocking when Mullen punted on 4th and 10 from our 37 -- I couldn't believe that he actually was confident that 10 points was enough to win. Most unranked underdogs coming into the Swamp would have gone for that because as the HBC used to say, you can't beat us by kicking FGs (much less punting the ball). But Mullen would say after the game "This was not an upset. Our team expected to win this game." It was clear at that moment that they did. And they proceeded to simply play to run clock the rest of the game, running on 29 of their last 30 plays. Did we make any adjustments to stop them? Of course not. And they knew we wouldn't be able to do anything on offense.
I feel bad for Chas Henry. Its not his fault and I hope he knows no one blames him. He's a punter, not a place kicker. Tell me why is it that we don't have a viable backup placekicker on the team?
We never ran a play-action pass. We never tried to stretch the field vertically. I actually just watched a highlight video of our game against Cincy, in which Loeffler called the plays because Addazio was acting head coach due to Meyer's health issues. On Riley Cooper's long TD, the announcer says "That is uncharacteristic for the FL offense. They are not a big play offense." Sad but true. Contrast that to 2007 and 2008.
Our red zone woes continued, going 1/3 on the day. We have scored TDs on 55% of red zone possessions under Addazio compared to 75% under Mullen (with Gonzales helping). That includes last season (34/68 with Tim Tebow).
Meyer said after the game we were "down to zero running backs". Umm isn't there a supposedly super-talented freshman named Mack Brown (no relation to the Texas coach) sitting on the bench? I really don't know what more can be said. The last time we lost to Mississippi State, a lot of good came out of it (God bless Sylvester Croom). Hopefully the same will be true this time because if Addazio isn't gone Monday morning, Meyer needs to be gone Tuesday morning!
Tim Brewster, Minnesota
Automatic under the Mississippi St. clause (more to come on Miss St. later too). Brewster got the axe on Sunday after losing to Purdue. Congratulations Minnesota and good luck in your coaching search!
Turner Gill, Kansas
Year 1 for Turner Gill has been ugly so far but wow, 59-7?
That's about it - there really wasn't a lot of bad coaching going on this week. There were some upsets sure - Texas beat Nebraska but that was certainly not a total shocker - neither was Wisconsin beating Nebraska. UK beating S. Carolina was somewhat surprising until you remember the Chicken Curse which manifested itself in the form of an injury to Lattimore and a terrible pass (on a great playcall) by Garcia at the end. None of these is really Zookworthy. However...
Urban Meyer & Steve Addazio, Florida
After a recruiting trip to PA to get a plan B in case Tim Tebow (who spent the day with Mike Shula) didn't come to UF, Urban Meyer and Greg Mattison sat on a plane in 5 degree weather on a tarmac in the middle of nowhere in PA. "He [Mattison] said, 'You realize if we don't get Tim Tebow, that will set the program back 10 years,'" said Meyer. "I said, 'Shut up.' He said, '10 years.' I got so upset with him, I grabbed a blanket and didn't talk to him the rest of the trip."
Urban Meyer was 48-7 with Tim Tebow. He is now 13-6 without him. Think about that for a second. Steve Spurrier never lost to an unranked team at home in 12 seasons. Urban Meyer has now lost to 3 in the last 4 years.
Once again the playcalling was anemic. We gained 14 yards on 12 first down plays in the first half, putting ourselves constantly in 2nd and 3rd and long situations. For the 6th time in 7 games this season, we failed to score in the 1st quarter. For the 2nd time since pre-Spurrier (Auburn 2007), we got shut out in the first half. For the 2nd time in 3 games, we got held to 7 points or less and the first time at home since a blowout loss to unranked LSU in the first year of the dark ages. On 14 of our first 21 first downs, we ran a read option dive play. The last 7 first downs we actually threw the ball because we were behind.
There were at least 4 or 5 plays where I went "oh shit" in the stands because I could see what play we were running and I could see that Miss St. also saw what play they were running. Every "oh shit" ended up in a loss or at best a no-gain on a play that the defense had sniffed out. It was shocking when Mullen punted on 4th and 10 from our 37 -- I couldn't believe that he actually was confident that 10 points was enough to win. Most unranked underdogs coming into the Swamp would have gone for that because as the HBC used to say, you can't beat us by kicking FGs (much less punting the ball). But Mullen would say after the game "This was not an upset. Our team expected to win this game." It was clear at that moment that they did. And they proceeded to simply play to run clock the rest of the game, running on 29 of their last 30 plays. Did we make any adjustments to stop them? Of course not. And they knew we wouldn't be able to do anything on offense.
I feel bad for Chas Henry. Its not his fault and I hope he knows no one blames him. He's a punter, not a place kicker. Tell me why is it that we don't have a viable backup placekicker on the team?
We never ran a play-action pass. We never tried to stretch the field vertically. I actually just watched a highlight video of our game against Cincy, in which Loeffler called the plays because Addazio was acting head coach due to Meyer's health issues. On Riley Cooper's long TD, the announcer says "That is uncharacteristic for the FL offense. They are not a big play offense." Sad but true. Contrast that to 2007 and 2008.
Our red zone woes continued, going 1/3 on the day. We have scored TDs on 55% of red zone possessions under Addazio compared to 75% under Mullen (with Gonzales helping). That includes last season (34/68 with Tim Tebow).
Meyer said after the game we were "down to zero running backs". Umm isn't there a supposedly super-talented freshman named Mack Brown (no relation to the Texas coach) sitting on the bench? I really don't know what more can be said. The last time we lost to Mississippi State, a lot of good came out of it (God bless Sylvester Croom). Hopefully the same will be true this time because if Addazio isn't gone Monday morning, Meyer needs to be gone Tuesday morning!
Week 6 winners
Co-winners:
Urban Meyer & Steve Addazio, Florida (11 points, bonus point for winning poll)
Joe Paterno (10 points, automatic under the Out-Zooked clause)
Runner-up:
Mike Locksley (4 points, words cannot describe how bad a coach he is).
Honorable mention (1 point each):
Les Miles, LSU
Randy Shannon, Miami
Rick Neuheisel, UCLA
Derek Dooley, Tennessee
Urban Meyer & Steve Addazio, Florida (11 points, bonus point for winning poll)
Joe Paterno (10 points, automatic under the Out-Zooked clause)
Runner-up:
Mike Locksley (4 points, words cannot describe how bad a coach he is).
Honorable mention (1 point each):
Les Miles, LSU
Randy Shannon, Miami
Rick Neuheisel, UCLA
Derek Dooley, Tennessee
The REAL Reason UF Has Been Struggling Offensively Since 2008...
The Red Sox had the Curse of the Bambino. The White Sox had the Curse of the Black Sox. The Cubs still have the Curse of the Billy Goat. Well, fellow Gators, we too have fallen victim to a curse, and our offense has not been the same since. And I'm not just speaking about the blithering idiot currently calling our offensive plays...no, I'm talking about a different breed of blithering idiot altogether.
Behold...the Curse of the Retarded Politician...
Behold...the Curse of the Retarded Politician...
Saturday, October 16, 2010
Is There Really A Need To Do Nominations This Week?
Thank God we still have a coach who gives a crap in Billy Donovan.
Monday, October 11, 2010
Week 6 nominations
Urban Meyer & Steve Addazio, Florida
Seriously was there anyone in the Swamp on Saturday night outside of the 11 people on the field and the UF coaching staff that didn't know Les Miles was going to run the same fake FG play he ran against S. Car. in 2007? We were all yelling watch the fake from row 5 but then our players sold out for the block on what would have been a 51 yard attempt and of course with a Satanic contract to hold up, the over-the-shoulder flip was 0.5 inches from being forward and ended up bouncing like a basketball right to the intended target.
Urban Meyer is now 9-8 vs the SEC West in just short of 6 seasons. In my 6 seasons under the Head Ball Coach, he was 14-4 against the West. The one difference is FSU which was top 4 every year Spurrier was here except 2001 while they have never been top 4 with Meyer which has allowed for Meyer's success. Under Spurrier from '93 until 2001, 8 of 9 years, UF still had legitimate national title hopes going into the FSU game. 1997 was the only year we took 2 losses into that game. .889 under Spurrier is .500 under Meyer. We don't expect to win championships every year but with the talent assembled here, we expect to be in contention and we certainly don't expect to be outcoached by the Mad Hatter.
We must not let the defensive failures at the end of the game detract from the horrible play-calling on offense once again. 14 read options on 22 first down plays. We have seen worse but over 60% of the time is still horrible. Our average gain on those 22 first down plays was 1.05 yards (23 yards on 22 plays). That is horrible. We put our offense in 2nd and 3rd and longs almost every series. Yet because Johnny Brantley is a pretty good QB and Carl Moore is turning into a very good WR (why is this not obvious to the coaching staff?) we pick up a lot of 3rd and longs and then ... go right back to the read option again. That is a primary reason why Florida is 96th ... yes, 96th, in total offense this season.
News flash: its not an option if everyone knows Brantley is going to pitch it and Burton is going to keep it. There's a reason it worked with Tebow -- he could run or take his patented self-play action rocker step and throw it. When was the last time you saw a UF team run a real honest-to-God play action? Brantley made a half motion in that direction once or twice but it wasn't a real play action fake. Look at Boise State's highlights for what I'm talking about - sell it by putting it in the RB's gut, then drop back with the ball behind your back then throw it. That play would be so money on first down for UF considering that every DC opposing us is expecting the read option dive!
Here are the lowlights from the game:
More stats to come later but for now I'll end with food for thought: Alabama and Florida are about equal in talent level. Nick Saban has destroyed us twice in a row. South Carolina is nowhere near the talent level of either of us but nonetheless convincingly beat Alabama. The difference: they have a ball coach in Columbia.
Les Miles, LSU
Not to be forgotten, The Mad Hatter tried to give use the game. We just wouldn't take it. He wasted 35 seconds off the play clock before calling timeout on 4th and 1 from the 34. Then he called a play that 90,000 out of 90,030 people in the stadium knew was coming. Luckily for him those 30 people were on the field or on the UF sidelines.
Randy Shannon, Miami
No shame in losing to an FSU team that is clearly on their way back. But getting destroyed 45-17 in a rivalry game in which you were favored? Embarrassing to say the least. Let's hope Randy Shannon doesn't still have sand in his vagina after FSU added two 4th quarter TDs like he did when UF kicked a late FG against them in 2008.
Joe Paterno, Penn State
Automatic under the Out-Zooked clause. This is his first win I believe but lets hope its also his last and we don't have another Bowden/FSU scenario on our hands. Get to 400 wins and retire with dignity JoePa!
Mike Locksley, New Mexico
I think the loser of this game was getting a Zook regardless but Locksley's Lobos are now 0-6 after losing to quite possibly the 2nd worst team in division 1-A.
Rick Neuheisel, UCLA
Seriously? You get blown out by Stanford, blow out Texas, then get blown out by a not-very-good Cal team that had itself recently gotten blown out by Nevada? Well good for Boise as the Broncos march on to a showdown with a Nevada team that is looking better by the week!
Derek Dooley, Tennessee
Again, losing this game is one thing. Getting embarrassed is another. Tenn could very well be a 4-8 team this year, repeating their 2-4 from the first half of the season!
Seriously was there anyone in the Swamp on Saturday night outside of the 11 people on the field and the UF coaching staff that didn't know Les Miles was going to run the same fake FG play he ran against S. Car. in 2007? We were all yelling watch the fake from row 5 but then our players sold out for the block on what would have been a 51 yard attempt and of course with a Satanic contract to hold up, the over-the-shoulder flip was 0.5 inches from being forward and ended up bouncing like a basketball right to the intended target.
Urban Meyer is now 9-8 vs the SEC West in just short of 6 seasons. In my 6 seasons under the Head Ball Coach, he was 14-4 against the West. The one difference is FSU which was top 4 every year Spurrier was here except 2001 while they have never been top 4 with Meyer which has allowed for Meyer's success. Under Spurrier from '93 until 2001, 8 of 9 years, UF still had legitimate national title hopes going into the FSU game. 1997 was the only year we took 2 losses into that game. .889 under Spurrier is .500 under Meyer. We don't expect to win championships every year but with the talent assembled here, we expect to be in contention and we certainly don't expect to be outcoached by the Mad Hatter.
We must not let the defensive failures at the end of the game detract from the horrible play-calling on offense once again. 14 read options on 22 first down plays. We have seen worse but over 60% of the time is still horrible. Our average gain on those 22 first down plays was 1.05 yards (23 yards on 22 plays). That is horrible. We put our offense in 2nd and 3rd and longs almost every series. Yet because Johnny Brantley is a pretty good QB and Carl Moore is turning into a very good WR (why is this not obvious to the coaching staff?) we pick up a lot of 3rd and longs and then ... go right back to the read option again. That is a primary reason why Florida is 96th ... yes, 96th, in total offense this season.
News flash: its not an option if everyone knows Brantley is going to pitch it and Burton is going to keep it. There's a reason it worked with Tebow -- he could run or take his patented self-play action rocker step and throw it. When was the last time you saw a UF team run a real honest-to-God play action? Brantley made a half motion in that direction once or twice but it wasn't a real play action fake. Look at Boise State's highlights for what I'm talking about - sell it by putting it in the RB's gut, then drop back with the ball behind your back then throw it. That play would be so money on first down for UF considering that every DC opposing us is expecting the read option dive!
Here are the lowlights from the game:
More stats to come later but for now I'll end with food for thought: Alabama and Florida are about equal in talent level. Nick Saban has destroyed us twice in a row. South Carolina is nowhere near the talent level of either of us but nonetheless convincingly beat Alabama. The difference: they have a ball coach in Columbia.
Les Miles, LSU
Not to be forgotten, The Mad Hatter tried to give use the game. We just wouldn't take it. He wasted 35 seconds off the play clock before calling timeout on 4th and 1 from the 34. Then he called a play that 90,000 out of 90,030 people in the stadium knew was coming. Luckily for him those 30 people were on the field or on the UF sidelines.
Randy Shannon, Miami
No shame in losing to an FSU team that is clearly on their way back. But getting destroyed 45-17 in a rivalry game in which you were favored? Embarrassing to say the least. Let's hope Randy Shannon doesn't still have sand in his vagina after FSU added two 4th quarter TDs like he did when UF kicked a late FG against them in 2008.
Joe Paterno, Penn State
Automatic under the Out-Zooked clause. This is his first win I believe but lets hope its also his last and we don't have another Bowden/FSU scenario on our hands. Get to 400 wins and retire with dignity JoePa!
Mike Locksley, New Mexico
I think the loser of this game was getting a Zook regardless but Locksley's Lobos are now 0-6 after losing to quite possibly the 2nd worst team in division 1-A.
Rick Neuheisel, UCLA
Seriously? You get blown out by Stanford, blow out Texas, then get blown out by a not-very-good Cal team that had itself recently gotten blown out by Nevada? Well good for Boise as the Broncos march on to a showdown with a Nevada team that is looking better by the week!
Derek Dooley, Tennessee
Again, losing this game is one thing. Getting embarrassed is another. Tenn could very well be a 4-8 team this year, repeating their 2-4 from the first half of the season!
Saturday, October 9, 2010
I Don't Care What Happens In The Second Half...
...if Steve Addazio is still offensive coordinator by the end of the day Monday, Meyer and Addazio should be awarded the Zook Award for the year, and we should institute an Addazio Award for sheer offensive idiocy.
Friday, October 8, 2010
Week 6 nominations
Post your thoughts here...
LSU/Florida and UGA/Tennessee games are both on Zookwatch!
LSU/Florida and UGA/Tennessee games are both on Zookwatch!
Week 5 winners
We have co-winners this week. Urban Meyer & Steve Addazio won the poll but the Mad Hatter is at least equally deserving if not moreso. Both are deserving of the full 10 points for the award. Both get a postgame comment bonus for their idiotic ramblings (Addazio & Miles that is). Meyer and Addizio get a second bonus point for winning the poll.
We would like to remind everyone that when we give the award to a head coach and an assistant, that means that we believe the shortcomings to be in the assistant coach who should be fired. The head coach shares the award because it is his job (see Sparano, Tony) to fire/demote the hapless, incapable assistant. We think Urban Meyer is a great CEO head coach but needs 2 good coordinators to be successful. He won't have that until he gets rid of Addazio.
Without further ado, co-winners:
Urban Meyer & Steve Addazio, Florida (12 points)
Les Miles, LSU (11 points)
Runner-up:
Derek Dooley, Tennessee, for enabling the Mad Hatter to still somehow win. 4 points.
Honorable Mentions (1 point each):
Mark Richt, UGA
Turner Gill, Kansas
Lane Kiffin, USC
Ron Zook, Illinois
Note that Bronco Mendenhall avoids honorable mention by way of firing his DC and taking action to resolve BYU's problems.
We would like to remind everyone that when we give the award to a head coach and an assistant, that means that we believe the shortcomings to be in the assistant coach who should be fired. The head coach shares the award because it is his job (see Sparano, Tony) to fire/demote the hapless, incapable assistant. We think Urban Meyer is a great CEO head coach but needs 2 good coordinators to be successful. He won't have that until he gets rid of Addazio.
Without further ado, co-winners:
Urban Meyer & Steve Addazio, Florida (12 points)
Les Miles, LSU (11 points)
Runner-up:
Derek Dooley, Tennessee, for enabling the Mad Hatter to still somehow win. 4 points.
Honorable Mentions (1 point each):
Mark Richt, UGA
Turner Gill, Kansas
Lane Kiffin, USC
Ron Zook, Illinois
Note that Bronco Mendenhall avoids honorable mention by way of firing his DC and taking action to resolve BYU's problems.
Wednesday, October 6, 2010
Time for the Zookers to swim with the fishes
A huge Anti-Zook goes out to the Godfather, Tony Soprano. Umm that's Sparano. But one could easily understand any confusion: Dolphins' special teams coach fired after loss. It took the Godfather all of 12 hours after the Dolphins MNF special teams debacle to fix the problem and give his special teams coach a pair of cement boots! When they talk about "axing" someone...
That is how you deal with someone who is not capable of doing their job. Can we please get him on the phone with Urban Meyer? And while the rest of us are very happy as the Mad Hatter bumbles his way through another season, I'm sure LSU fans would like their AD to give ol' Leslie an offer he can't refuse.
Even the head ball coach got into the act at his press conference:
Meanwhile at Steve Addazio's Tuesday press conference:
What an absolute moron! You think he's going to start saying "If you sleep 4 hours fast, its just like sleeping 8 hours" and "We're really close. We've got a long way to go but we're really close!" any minute now!
And then there's this image from the game:
Notice anything wrong with our O-line play? And then there's the issue of course of our playcalling as CBS thankfully pointed out to everyone:
Not to be outdone though, there is this absolute must read in today's Forde Yard Dash absolutely ripping into Miles. The white meat:
That is how you deal with someone who is not capable of doing their job. Can we please get him on the phone with Urban Meyer? And while the rest of us are very happy as the Mad Hatter bumbles his way through another season, I'm sure LSU fans would like their AD to give ol' Leslie an offer he can't refuse.
Even the head ball coach got into the act at his press conference:
But in vintage Spurrier fashion, he didn’t stop there.Gotta love the HBC!
“Of course, sometimes you can win and still be a dummy,” Spurrier cracked. “We’ve learned that recently, too.”
Now, he didn’t mention any names, but the smirk on his face was priceless.
Any chance he might have watched the ending of that LSU-Tennessee game last weekend?
Meanwhile at Steve Addazio's Tuesday press conference:
What an absolute moron! You think he's going to start saying "If you sleep 4 hours fast, its just like sleeping 8 hours" and "We're really close. We've got a long way to go but we're really close!" any minute now!
And then there's this image from the game:
Notice anything wrong with our O-line play? And then there's the issue of course of our playcalling as CBS thankfully pointed out to everyone:
Not to be outdone though, there is this absolute must read in today's Forde Yard Dash absolutely ripping into Miles. The white meat:
In Satan's lair, there is a lockbox with the words "LES MILES (2)" written on it. Inside is the LSU coach's soul.And apparently the following press conference was just as bewildering as Addazio above:
There is no other possible explanation. The Hat clearly has made a deal with Lucifer that allows him to win nearly 80 percent of his games as coach of the Tigers, capture a national title and make more money than all but a tiny fraction of working Americans. And doing it with a unique flair for coaching lunacy in pressure situations.
The latest installment, of course, was the Tennessee-LSU game (3) on Saturday in Baton Rouge. The winning drive contained this masterpiece sequence -- LSU timeout, incomplete pass, delay of game, LSU timeout -- but that ultimately was dwarfed by the 30 seconds of anarchy that ended the game.
The Dash's mind reeled while watching the Tigers simply … fail … to act … as the seconds drained away. Were they really doing this again? Would the game really end with LSU on the 1-yard line, down by four points, running a catastrophic fire drill of a final play?
Alas, no. There was a Satanic contract to uphold, and half of the Volunteers' travel squad was on the field, and so there was an untimed do-over that of course went The Hat's way. And thus LSU won 16-14, in a game that set football coaching back to somewhere in the 19th century.
And the do-over TD sent Miles to the postgame press conference as a winner for the second time after massacring clock management (see below for the other). There, with his mind still off somewhere in the Lesmosphere, he spoke before taking questions for four minutes in his usual baroque and bewildering way.
"I think this team will force out some of the fat, and get to the leaner meat," he declared at one point.
Monday, October 4, 2010
Week 5 nominations
Urban Meyer & Steve Addazio, Florida
Absolutely inexcusable! Addazio needs to be gone yesterday! Actually can we make it retroactive to a week ago? I was at the game so I didn't realize until someone called us that CBS actually showed like 5 replays of Bama's entire defensive coaching staff jumping up and down yelling "jump pass" to the players! And we still run the play and surprise, its picked off! Then our coaching staff just gives up in the 2nd quarter. We are down 24-0, 3 scores, and we kick a FG to cut it to ... 3 scores!?!?? And then we kick another FG to cut it to ... 3 scores!??! We stopped trying to win midway through the 2nd quarter and that is inexcusable!
More thoughts to come later and some video evidence but let's leave this out there for thought - in the past season and a half, our offense has looked really good in one game - against Cincinnati, when Tim Tebow set a BCS record for most passing yards. Who called the plays for that game? Scott Loeffler, our QB coach, as Addazio was assuming the role of "acting head coach" for the game due to Meyer's health problems. Ironically we'd actually be doing much better if Meyer was taking time off as was once mentioned and Addazio were interim head coach because then he wouldn't be calling the plays. Of course as soon as he wasn't able to recruit the players Meyer would, that would go downhill very fast but it is ironic.
Mark Richt, Georgia
The seat is now white hot for Richt. Wow. Blowing a 10 point lead against Colorado and their lame duck coach Dan Hawkins (who no one expects to coach a game in the PAC 12 next year) is downright awful. I still think Richt gets one more season to turn it around but I'm not as sure as I was after last week. They are all but guaranteed a losing record at this point for the first time in Richt's career. What if they go 3-9?
Derek Dooley, Tennessee
Seriously? 13 men, not even 12. And when LSU was in such an obvious state of disarray (as they usually are in late game situations). All they had to do was keep the guys they had on the field and they walk away with the win. Instead the Mad Hatter's neverending string of crazy luck continues for one more week at least...
Les Miles, LSU
Les started the game of "anything you can do I can do worse" before Dooley one-upped him. Is there any coach who has more Zookish late game management skills? I think we may have to name a clause after him for blowing a game with horrible clock management! Somehow he continues to get insanely lucky (if you ever see Les in Vegas, make sure you put all your chips on the same number he does on the roulette wheel!) Yes LSU somehow won the game but certainly not because of anything they did right as they did their absolute best to give it away.
And that's just the SEC ... wow what a week of terrible coaching!
Bronco Mendenhall, BYU
See Gerald's post below.
Turner Gill, Kansas
55-7 loss to Baylor? Baylor? Wow.
Lane Kiffin, USC
Worth at least of an honorable mention. We knew they weren't very good ... so did the voters who had them #18 at 4-0 ... but we didn't expect the first loss to come to a Washington team that had been embarrassingly bad against Nebraska.
Absolutely inexcusable! Addazio needs to be gone yesterday! Actually can we make it retroactive to a week ago? I was at the game so I didn't realize until someone called us that CBS actually showed like 5 replays of Bama's entire defensive coaching staff jumping up and down yelling "jump pass" to the players! And we still run the play and surprise, its picked off! Then our coaching staff just gives up in the 2nd quarter. We are down 24-0, 3 scores, and we kick a FG to cut it to ... 3 scores!?!?? And then we kick another FG to cut it to ... 3 scores!??! We stopped trying to win midway through the 2nd quarter and that is inexcusable!
More thoughts to come later and some video evidence but let's leave this out there for thought - in the past season and a half, our offense has looked really good in one game - against Cincinnati, when Tim Tebow set a BCS record for most passing yards. Who called the plays for that game? Scott Loeffler, our QB coach, as Addazio was assuming the role of "acting head coach" for the game due to Meyer's health problems. Ironically we'd actually be doing much better if Meyer was taking time off as was once mentioned and Addazio were interim head coach because then he wouldn't be calling the plays. Of course as soon as he wasn't able to recruit the players Meyer would, that would go downhill very fast but it is ironic.
Mark Richt, Georgia
The seat is now white hot for Richt. Wow. Blowing a 10 point lead against Colorado and their lame duck coach Dan Hawkins (who no one expects to coach a game in the PAC 12 next year) is downright awful. I still think Richt gets one more season to turn it around but I'm not as sure as I was after last week. They are all but guaranteed a losing record at this point for the first time in Richt's career. What if they go 3-9?
Derek Dooley, Tennessee
Seriously? 13 men, not even 12. And when LSU was in such an obvious state of disarray (as they usually are in late game situations). All they had to do was keep the guys they had on the field and they walk away with the win. Instead the Mad Hatter's neverending string of crazy luck continues for one more week at least...
Les Miles, LSU
Les started the game of "anything you can do I can do worse" before Dooley one-upped him. Is there any coach who has more Zookish late game management skills? I think we may have to name a clause after him for blowing a game with horrible clock management! Somehow he continues to get insanely lucky (if you ever see Les in Vegas, make sure you put all your chips on the same number he does on the roulette wheel!) Yes LSU somehow won the game but certainly not because of anything they did right as they did their absolute best to give it away.
And that's just the SEC ... wow what a week of terrible coaching!
Bronco Mendenhall, BYU
See Gerald's post below.
Turner Gill, Kansas
55-7 loss to Baylor? Baylor? Wow.
Lane Kiffin, USC
Worth at least of an honorable mention. We knew they weren't very good ... so did the voters who had them #18 at 4-0 ... but we didn't expect the first loss to come to a Washington team that had been embarrassingly bad against Nebraska.
Week 4 winners
Co-winners (8 points each):
Danny Hope, Purdue
Tim Brewster, Minnesota
Runner-up (3 points):
Mack Brown, Texas
Honorable mention (1 point each):
Mike Locksley, New Mexico
Derek Dooley, Tennessee
Mark Richt, Georgia
Danny Hope, Purdue
Tim Brewster, Minnesota
Runner-up (3 points):
Mack Brown, Texas
Honorable mention (1 point each):
Mike Locksley, New Mexico
Derek Dooley, Tennessee
Mark Richt, Georgia
Saturday, October 2, 2010
A Long Overdue Nomination for BYU
They've been flying under the radar so far this season; but after an opening week squeaker over a pitiful Washington squad, BYU has not come within two touchdowns of beating an opponent since. Their latest loss: a 31-16 thrashing at the hands of Utah State, a team less than a week removed from its own 41-7 thrashing at the hands of San Diego State. The performance led to the immediate firing of BYU's defensive coordinator. I couldn't find a way to qualify BYU's coaching performance under any of the recognized clauses (though technically the fired DC, Jaime Hill, gets honorable mention under the Mississippi State clause, he wasn't a head coach, so it doesn't exactly fit here), but it's time to recognize the coaching futility of Bronco Mendenhall, who has led a traditional non-AQ power to a 1-4 record that doesn't begin to do justice to just how far this once proud program has fallen. I hereby nominate Mendenhall for Zooking the Mormons.
Thursday, September 30, 2010
Week 4 nominations
Sorry for the delay again. Winners will be posted hopefully tonight.
Danny Hope, Purdue
Losing to Toledo by double figures? I know Robert Marve was injured but that doesn't explain how you let Toledo, who came in ranked last in the nation in total offense, score 31 points on you!
Tim Brewster, Minnesota
Figures to be automatic under the Mississippi State clause by season's end. It was a bad week for the Big 10 as Minnesota also lost to a MAC team, N. Illinois. There were at least three "Fire Brewster" chants during the game. Deservedly so. The Gophers just put a lot of money into their stadium and its time for them to put some money into finding someone who can coach.
Mike Locksley, New Mexico
Previously winless UNLV put up 45 on the Lobos in a rout. The scary thing is that was the fewest points New Mexico has allowed this season. After giving up 72, 52, and 56, in their first 3 games, the Lobos are last in the country in points allowed at 56.3 per game. They also rank 119th of 120 in points scored, with only 10.3 per game (yes that's an average margin of -46.0!)
Mack Brown, Texas
Losing to UCLA (1-2) would have been a surprise. Losing 34-12 is a huge shocker. Texas clearly has no offense and when you keep turning the ball over, its hard on your defense. Next up: Bobby Stoops and the Red River Shootout. Think Stoops has visions of 60+ like he did a couple times early in his career against the Longhorns?
Derek Dooley, Tennessee
Needed double OT to hold off Alabama ... Birmingham. Shades of Zook vs UK in 2004.
Mark Richt, Georgia
The seat is definitely getting warm after an 0-3 start to SEC play, with the latest loss to the "other Bulldogs" in the SEC. Getting AJ Jones back might not be enough to turn around a Georgia team with lots of problems.
Danny Hope, Purdue
Losing to Toledo by double figures? I know Robert Marve was injured but that doesn't explain how you let Toledo, who came in ranked last in the nation in total offense, score 31 points on you!
Tim Brewster, Minnesota
Figures to be automatic under the Mississippi State clause by season's end. It was a bad week for the Big 10 as Minnesota also lost to a MAC team, N. Illinois. There were at least three "Fire Brewster" chants during the game. Deservedly so. The Gophers just put a lot of money into their stadium and its time for them to put some money into finding someone who can coach.
Mike Locksley, New Mexico
Previously winless UNLV put up 45 on the Lobos in a rout. The scary thing is that was the fewest points New Mexico has allowed this season. After giving up 72, 52, and 56, in their first 3 games, the Lobos are last in the country in points allowed at 56.3 per game. They also rank 119th of 120 in points scored, with only 10.3 per game (yes that's an average margin of -46.0!)
Mack Brown, Texas
Losing to UCLA (1-2) would have been a surprise. Losing 34-12 is a huge shocker. Texas clearly has no offense and when you keep turning the ball over, its hard on your defense. Next up: Bobby Stoops and the Red River Shootout. Think Stoops has visions of 60+ like he did a couple times early in his career against the Longhorns?
Derek Dooley, Tennessee
Needed double OT to hold off Alabama ... Birmingham. Shades of Zook vs UK in 2004.
Mark Richt, Georgia
The seat is definitely getting warm after an 0-3 start to SEC play, with the latest loss to the "other Bulldogs" in the SEC. Getting AJ Jones back might not be enough to turn around a Georgia team with lots of problems.
Week 3 winners
Sorry for the delay. Catching up:
Week 3 winner (8 points): Houston Nutt, Ole Miss
Runners-up (3 points each):
Turner Gill, Kansas
Urban Meyer & Steve Addazio, Florida
Honorable Mention (1 point):
Jeff Tedford, Cal
Week 3 winner (8 points): Houston Nutt, Ole Miss
Runners-up (3 points each):
Turner Gill, Kansas
Urban Meyer & Steve Addazio, Florida
Honorable Mention (1 point):
Jeff Tedford, Cal
Friday, September 17, 2010
Week 3 nominations
Sorry for the delay in nominations but better late than never.
The Right Reverend, Houston Nutt, Ole Miss:
Houston Nutt may earn himself a Mississippi State clause by the time this season is done. The king of oversigning shows again just how dirty he is with the whole Masoli incident and then after all that he goes out and loses to Jax St. and now gets beat convincingly by Vanderbilt. Yes, the same Vandy whose coach up and quit right before the start of the season!
Turner Gill, Kansas
What the hell is going on with KU? First they lose to a 1-AA team, then they upset GA Tech, now they get blown out by Southern Miss?
Jeff Tedford, Cal
Losing to Nevada isn't the worst thing, although it would have been an upset by itself but giving up 52 points and getting blown out down the stretch is definitely Zookworthy.
Urban Meyer & Steve Addazio, Florida
Yes, we did win the game by 2 scores but it took a fake punt (side note: Meyer is now 8-8 on fake punts all-time at UF) to get the momentum back and put the game away. The defense played fine other than one busted coverage but the playcalling is still atrocious and it seems people are finally starting to notice. Add to that Chris Rainey's arrest, the 30th arrest under Meyer at UF (and we no longer have Tim Tebow to balance out the arrests). Meyer says he is fed up with it. Well then here's a novel idea, coach: try giving players more than a slap on the wrist. Now if a kid gets arrested for underage drinking or something stupid like that, there's no need to suspend him -- and a lot of the 30 arrests are misdemeanors like that or driving with a suspended license. However, the players who commit serious felonies need to know there are serious consequences, like getting kicked off the team for a whole season. Carlos Dunlap is passed out at a green light with a .18 BAC, 4 days before the SEC title game, and he gets reinstated for the bowl game. Is it any surprise that Frankie Hammond does the same thing a few months later (he was going 45 and swerving in a 20mph zone on campus with 2 open whiskey bottles). He knew he'd get a slap on the wrist and after some tough talk, was reinstated for Tenn and caught a TD pass last Saturday. We'll probably see Rainey back for the Bama game if history is any precedent. By then he probably won't be the latest arrest anymore anyway.
I guess that's it for this week. I'm tempted to nominate Zook for having to come from behind to beat NIU but I'm sure he'll have worse performances than that in the weeks ahead. We'll post the final winners tomorrow.
The Right Reverend, Houston Nutt, Ole Miss:
Houston Nutt may earn himself a Mississippi State clause by the time this season is done. The king of oversigning shows again just how dirty he is with the whole Masoli incident and then after all that he goes out and loses to Jax St. and now gets beat convincingly by Vanderbilt. Yes, the same Vandy whose coach up and quit right before the start of the season!
Turner Gill, Kansas
What the hell is going on with KU? First they lose to a 1-AA team, then they upset GA Tech, now they get blown out by Southern Miss?
Jeff Tedford, Cal
Losing to Nevada isn't the worst thing, although it would have been an upset by itself but giving up 52 points and getting blown out down the stretch is definitely Zookworthy.
Urban Meyer & Steve Addazio, Florida
Yes, we did win the game by 2 scores but it took a fake punt (side note: Meyer is now 8-8 on fake punts all-time at UF) to get the momentum back and put the game away. The defense played fine other than one busted coverage but the playcalling is still atrocious and it seems people are finally starting to notice. Add to that Chris Rainey's arrest, the 30th arrest under Meyer at UF (and we no longer have Tim Tebow to balance out the arrests). Meyer says he is fed up with it. Well then here's a novel idea, coach: try giving players more than a slap on the wrist. Now if a kid gets arrested for underage drinking or something stupid like that, there's no need to suspend him -- and a lot of the 30 arrests are misdemeanors like that or driving with a suspended license. However, the players who commit serious felonies need to know there are serious consequences, like getting kicked off the team for a whole season. Carlos Dunlap is passed out at a green light with a .18 BAC, 4 days before the SEC title game, and he gets reinstated for the bowl game. Is it any surprise that Frankie Hammond does the same thing a few months later (he was going 45 and swerving in a 20mph zone on campus with 2 open whiskey bottles). He knew he'd get a slap on the wrist and after some tough talk, was reinstated for Tenn and caught a TD pass last Saturday. We'll probably see Rainey back for the Bama game if history is any precedent. By then he probably won't be the latest arrest anymore anyway.
I guess that's it for this week. I'm tempted to nominate Zook for having to come from behind to beat NIU but I'm sure he'll have worse performances than that in the weeks ahead. We'll post the final winners tomorrow.
Week 2 winners
Winner: Frank Beamer, VA Tech, 11 points (1 for winning poll)
Runners-up (4 points each): Paul Hewitt, GA Tech and Doc Holliday, Marshall
Honorable Mention (1 point each):
Jimbo Fisher, FSU
Lane Kiffin, USC
Dan Hawkins, Colorado
Tim Brewster, Minnesota
Rick Neuheisel, UCLA
Full point totals to be updated soon but I'm on my phone in ATL on the way to Knoxville right now.
Monday, September 13, 2010
Week 2 nominations
Sorry for the delay - was at games both Sat and Sun! Let's move on to the week 2 nominations:
As David mentioned, Frank Beamer, Virginia Tech. Automatic under the Hawkins-Carr clause for losing to a 1-AA team. I believe VA Tech is only the 2nd ranked team to lose to a 1-AA team. Boise State pretty much beat the Hokies twice as this was the classic case of a hangover game after a tough loss. And who is to blame for not getting the players properly motivated? Yep, the coaching staff. Horrendous performance by the Hokies and no one is more upset about it than Boise State who is hoping VA Tech wins out the rest of the way.
As nominated by Gerald, Paul Hewitt, GA Tech. Horrible day for the Techs and the ACC in general. To answer Gerald's question, he is not automatic but certainly Zookworthy nonetheless. I would advocate runner-up status.
Doc Holliday, Marshall for blowing a 15-point lead late in the 3rd quarter by going to a prevent defense, which we all know only prevents you from winning! Also take note of Aaron Dobson dropping the ball before crossing the goal line - although this was not seen by the refs, this is absolutely inexcusable and carelessness like that falls on the coaching staff as well.
Jimbo Fisher, FSU, for his team not even showing up to Norman in a game that was supposed to be competitive at the least. Many people were picking FSU to pull the upset and make a statement. Instead, FSU's porous defense allowed over 300 yards passing ... in the first half alone en route to a 34-7 halftime lead. Only a meaningless TD on the last play of the game kept it from becoming FSU's worst defeat in 20 years.
Lane Kiffin, USC, for looking anemic offensively and barely surviving a bad UVA home in the Coliseum, 17-14. The Cavaliers outgained the Trojans and both teams played very undisciplined, having over 100 penalty yards each.
Dan Hawkins, Colorado. Already on the hot seat, loses embarrassingly 52-7 to California. A sign of things to come in the PAC-12? Well we're pretty sure Hawkins won't be around to see.
Tim Brewster, Minnesota for losing 41-38 to 1-AA South Dakota. This following a 2007 loss to North Dakota State. No division 1-A team should ever lose to a Dakota period. This is not automatic as Minnesota isn't good enough to qualify for the Hawkins-Carr clause but Brewster, like Hawkins, was one of the coaches on every preseason hot-seat list and this loss has likely all but sealed his fate.
Rick Neuheisel, UCLA. Losing to Stanford was expected. Losing 35-0 was ridiculous. UCLA is supposed to be a program on the rise and they just completely got dominated in this game.
As David mentioned, Frank Beamer, Virginia Tech. Automatic under the Hawkins-Carr clause for losing to a 1-AA team. I believe VA Tech is only the 2nd ranked team to lose to a 1-AA team. Boise State pretty much beat the Hokies twice as this was the classic case of a hangover game after a tough loss. And who is to blame for not getting the players properly motivated? Yep, the coaching staff. Horrendous performance by the Hokies and no one is more upset about it than Boise State who is hoping VA Tech wins out the rest of the way.
As nominated by Gerald, Paul Hewitt, GA Tech. Horrible day for the Techs and the ACC in general. To answer Gerald's question, he is not automatic but certainly Zookworthy nonetheless. I would advocate runner-up status.
Doc Holliday, Marshall for blowing a 15-point lead late in the 3rd quarter by going to a prevent defense, which we all know only prevents you from winning! Also take note of Aaron Dobson dropping the ball before crossing the goal line - although this was not seen by the refs, this is absolutely inexcusable and carelessness like that falls on the coaching staff as well.
Jimbo Fisher, FSU, for his team not even showing up to Norman in a game that was supposed to be competitive at the least. Many people were picking FSU to pull the upset and make a statement. Instead, FSU's porous defense allowed over 300 yards passing ... in the first half alone en route to a 34-7 halftime lead. Only a meaningless TD on the last play of the game kept it from becoming FSU's worst defeat in 20 years.
Lane Kiffin, USC, for looking anemic offensively and barely surviving a bad UVA home in the Coliseum, 17-14. The Cavaliers outgained the Trojans and both teams played very undisciplined, having over 100 penalty yards each.
Dan Hawkins, Colorado. Already on the hot seat, loses embarrassingly 52-7 to California. A sign of things to come in the PAC-12? Well we're pretty sure Hawkins won't be around to see.
Tim Brewster, Minnesota for losing 41-38 to 1-AA South Dakota. This following a 2007 loss to North Dakota State. No division 1-A team should ever lose to a Dakota period. This is not automatic as Minnesota isn't good enough to qualify for the Hawkins-Carr clause but Brewster, like Hawkins, was one of the coaches on every preseason hot-seat list and this loss has likely all but sealed his fate.
Rick Neuheisel, UCLA. Losing to Stanford was expected. Losing 35-0 was ridiculous. UCLA is supposed to be a program on the rise and they just completely got dominated in this game.
Sunday, September 12, 2010
Week 2 Potential Nomination
Does Va Tech potentially qualify for losing to FCS James Madison? They continued to make the same mistakes they did against Boise State. 1 TD and 3 FGs is unacceptable.
Friday, September 10, 2010
Preseason and Week 1 winners
Ok guys, let's step it up for week 2. I see some votes in the poll but no comments. I'll go ahead and name the preseason and week 1 winners under our new scoring system:
Lane Kiffin Preseason Award
And the Kiffin goes to ... its a tie between Butch Davis and Rich Rodriguez both under serious NCAA investigations. 10 points apiece.
Runner-up (4 points): None other than Lane Kiffin himself.
Honorable mentions (1 point each): Houston Nutt, Les Miles, Derek Dooley
Week 1 Winners
Co-winners:
Houston Nutt, Ole Miss 11 points. Automatic under the Hawkins-Carr clause. The extra point is awarded for winning the reader poll.
Turner Gill, Kansas, 10 points. Also automatic under the Hawkins-Carr clause for losing to a 1-AA team.
Runner-up: As much as I'd like to give it to Addazio, I have to go with Mike Locksley, UNM. Absolutely horrendous. And what else would you expect from a Zook protege. I expect Locksley to receive an automatic award under the Mississippi State clause by the end of the season. 4 points.
Honorable mentions (1 point each): Urban Meyer & Steve Addazio, Ron Zook.
Boise State
Finally, congratulations to Kellen Moore and Boise State! What a great game and a great finish on Monday night! Once again the Broncos have proved they are for real and unless they slip up, they have a good chance of making the BCS title game. I for one and excited to see what they can do if they make it there! If Boise State gets there over a 1-loss Ohio State team, the anti-playoff Big 10 will all of a sudden be supporting ACC commissioner John Swofford's plus one system in 2014 and we will finally move toward a playoff!
Season Standings
1. Houston Nutt, Ole Miss (12)
2. Butch Davis, UNC (10)
Turner Gill, Kansas (10)
Rich Rodriguez, Michigan (10)
5. Lane Kiffin, USC (4)
Mike Locksley, UNM (4)
7. Derek Dooley, Tennessee (1)
Urban Meyer & Steve Addazio, Florida (1)
Les Miles, LSU (1)
Ron Zook, Illinois (1)
Lane Kiffin Preseason Award
And the Kiffin goes to ... its a tie between Butch Davis and Rich Rodriguez both under serious NCAA investigations. 10 points apiece.
Runner-up (4 points): None other than Lane Kiffin himself.
Honorable mentions (1 point each): Houston Nutt, Les Miles, Derek Dooley
Week 1 Winners
Co-winners:
Houston Nutt, Ole Miss 11 points. Automatic under the Hawkins-Carr clause. The extra point is awarded for winning the reader poll.
Turner Gill, Kansas, 10 points. Also automatic under the Hawkins-Carr clause for losing to a 1-AA team.
Runner-up: As much as I'd like to give it to Addazio, I have to go with Mike Locksley, UNM. Absolutely horrendous. And what else would you expect from a Zook protege. I expect Locksley to receive an automatic award under the Mississippi State clause by the end of the season. 4 points.
Honorable mentions (1 point each): Urban Meyer & Steve Addazio, Ron Zook.
Boise State
Finally, congratulations to Kellen Moore and Boise State! What a great game and a great finish on Monday night! Once again the Broncos have proved they are for real and unless they slip up, they have a good chance of making the BCS title game. I for one and excited to see what they can do if they make it there! If Boise State gets there over a 1-loss Ohio State team, the anti-playoff Big 10 will all of a sudden be supporting ACC commissioner John Swofford's plus one system in 2014 and we will finally move toward a playoff!
Season Standings
1. Houston Nutt, Ole Miss (12)
2. Butch Davis, UNC (10)
Turner Gill, Kansas (10)
Rich Rodriguez, Michigan (10)
5. Lane Kiffin, USC (4)
Mike Locksley, UNM (4)
7. Derek Dooley, Tennessee (1)
Urban Meyer & Steve Addazio, Florida (1)
Les Miles, LSU (1)
Ron Zook, Illinois (1)
Monday, September 6, 2010
Week 1 nominations
College football season is finally back and there's loads of incompetence to go around on the coaching side of things as always! There's still one more day of football to go but here are the nominees so far for week 1:
The Right Reverend, Houston Nutt, Ole Miss - Hotty toddy gosh almighty who the hell are we? Hey! Flim Flam, Bim Bam, JAX STATE BY DAMN! Automatic under the Hawkins-Carr clause for losing at home to 1-AA Jacksonville State in 2OT 49-48!
Urban Meyer & Steve Addazio, Florida - For having only 25 yards of total offense including negative yards rushing through 3 quarters against a Miami of Ohio team that went 1-11 last year. There were lots of bad snaps that got UF out of their rhythm but you know what, Addazio is the OL coach too so that's also his responsibility. Addazio handcuffed Tim Tebow as much as you can handcuff Superman last season and now we're seeing even more tangibly why you never see OL coaches promoted to OC. Or as the old adage goes, Never hire a football coach with a Z in his name. Always hire a basketball coach with 2 Z's in his name. Meyer meanwhile is a fantastic program manager, the best in the business - he's perfected what Bobby Bowden pioneered - but he is like Bowden a terrible gameday coach and needs coordinators with A) the brains to call a good gameplan and B) the balls to stand up to Meyer when he panics. Addazio has neither and Meyer needs to realize that.
Mike Locksley, New Mexico - former Ron Zook assistant somehow got a head coaching job at UNM last season and led them to a 1-11 record amidst allegations of sexual discrimination and a 10 day suspension for punching an assistant coach. He's picked up right where he left off, with a 72-0 humiliation by Oregon which was 59-0 at the half before Chip Kelly took his foot off the gas.
Ron Zook, Illinoise - Yes, it sometimes seems just too easy to put him on here and sometimes it seems like he has to fail extra-spectacularly to be nominated but I think at the start of the season, we need to remind ourselves just how bad he is and that if this seemingly pedestrian performance were from anyone else, it would have certainly landed them a nomination. Illinois led Mizzou 13-3 at the half and had controlled the game for the entire first half, moved the ball well, and had shut down a Missouri team that had to kick its starting RB off the team earlier in the week because of sexual assault charges. Then of course Ron Zook came out in the second half in his patented prevent offense (they gained all of 85 yards the second half) and prevent defense (Mizzou's QB had 167 of his 281 yards passing in the second half) and Mizzou won going away, 23-13.
Turner Gill, Kansas - Lost 6-3 to division 1-AA North Dakota State in his debut. Can I get a judgement from people - does Kansas qualify as good enough for this to be automatic under the Hawkins-Carr clause? They did lose their final 7 games last year but still, no one expected this. I would lean toward making this automatic.
Post additional nominations in the comments section and we'll discuss this week. I find it unlikely that either of the coaches tomorrow night will end up on Zookwatch but its definitely one of the games of the season so check out Boise St. vs VT - you'll probably see a clinic on how not to end up here, lol! I'm on record as going out on a limb and picking Boise St. to win the national title but this is definitely going to be their biggest test, on the road basically against another top 10 and well-coached team! I'll hopefully catch the second half at a bar after I land in Minneapolis!
We have till Thurs to make our final awards this week because of the late game and since we're getting a late start on just getting back!
The Right Reverend, Houston Nutt, Ole Miss - Hotty toddy gosh almighty who the hell are we? Hey! Flim Flam, Bim Bam, JAX STATE BY DAMN! Automatic under the Hawkins-Carr clause for losing at home to 1-AA Jacksonville State in 2OT 49-48!
Urban Meyer & Steve Addazio, Florida - For having only 25 yards of total offense including negative yards rushing through 3 quarters against a Miami of Ohio team that went 1-11 last year. There were lots of bad snaps that got UF out of their rhythm but you know what, Addazio is the OL coach too so that's also his responsibility. Addazio handcuffed Tim Tebow as much as you can handcuff Superman last season and now we're seeing even more tangibly why you never see OL coaches promoted to OC. Or as the old adage goes, Never hire a football coach with a Z in his name. Always hire a basketball coach with 2 Z's in his name. Meyer meanwhile is a fantastic program manager, the best in the business - he's perfected what Bobby Bowden pioneered - but he is like Bowden a terrible gameday coach and needs coordinators with A) the brains to call a good gameplan and B) the balls to stand up to Meyer when he panics. Addazio has neither and Meyer needs to realize that.
Mike Locksley, New Mexico - former Ron Zook assistant somehow got a head coaching job at UNM last season and led them to a 1-11 record amidst allegations of sexual discrimination and a 10 day suspension for punching an assistant coach. He's picked up right where he left off, with a 72-0 humiliation by Oregon which was 59-0 at the half before Chip Kelly took his foot off the gas.
Ron Zook, Illinoise - Yes, it sometimes seems just too easy to put him on here and sometimes it seems like he has to fail extra-spectacularly to be nominated but I think at the start of the season, we need to remind ourselves just how bad he is and that if this seemingly pedestrian performance were from anyone else, it would have certainly landed them a nomination. Illinois led Mizzou 13-3 at the half and had controlled the game for the entire first half, moved the ball well, and had shut down a Missouri team that had to kick its starting RB off the team earlier in the week because of sexual assault charges. Then of course Ron Zook came out in the second half in his patented prevent offense (they gained all of 85 yards the second half) and prevent defense (Mizzou's QB had 167 of his 281 yards passing in the second half) and Mizzou won going away, 23-13.
Turner Gill, Kansas - Lost 6-3 to division 1-AA North Dakota State in his debut. Can I get a judgement from people - does Kansas qualify as good enough for this to be automatic under the Hawkins-Carr clause? They did lose their final 7 games last year but still, no one expected this. I would lean toward making this automatic.
Post additional nominations in the comments section and we'll discuss this week. I find it unlikely that either of the coaches tomorrow night will end up on Zookwatch but its definitely one of the games of the season so check out Boise St. vs VT - you'll probably see a clinic on how not to end up here, lol! I'm on record as going out on a limb and picking Boise St. to win the national title but this is definitely going to be their biggest test, on the road basically against another top 10 and well-coached team! I'll hopefully catch the second half at a bar after I land in Minneapolis!
We have till Thurs to make our final awards this week because of the late game and since we're getting a late start on just getting back!
The 2010 Lane Kiffin Preseason Award
Ok so we're a little late on this one having just got the blog back up and running, but in a tumultuous offseason, here are the nominations for the 2010 Kiffin Preseason Award:
Butch Davis, UNC - for having 13 players suspended for the season opener due to alleged improper contact with agents. Add to that an investigation into academic fraud involving a tutor that Davis used to personally employ.
Houston Nutt, Ole Miss - the king of oversigning now decides to exploit a loophole to sign Jeremiah Masoli after he had been kicked out of Oregon. Read Stewart Mandel's take here.
Leslie Miles, LSU - Gregg Doyel thinks Les is a bad guy. Normally I'm not one to agree with Doyel but what he did to Elliot Porter is inexcusable.
Lane Kiffin, USC - for being stupid enough to take the USC job knowing sanctions were pending and for the way he handled leaving Tennessee.
Derek Dooley, Tennessee - Sticking with the Tenn theme - and some of the blame for this probably goes to Kiffin as well given that they were his recruits but still any head coach should be able to step in and convince his kids that starting a bar brawl and knocking a police officer unconscious is not a good idea.
Rich Rodriguez, Michigan - While still being investigated for secondary NCAA violations at Michigan, the NCAA announced that they were now also investigating charges that he committed similar violations while at WVU. All this after leading Michigan to a horrendous 8-16 mark the last two seasons. He'd better surpass the 8 win mark this season alone if he wants to be around for year four.
Any other nominations? Post them in the comment section and let's discuss!
Butch Davis, UNC - for having 13 players suspended for the season opener due to alleged improper contact with agents. Add to that an investigation into academic fraud involving a tutor that Davis used to personally employ.
Houston Nutt, Ole Miss - the king of oversigning now decides to exploit a loophole to sign Jeremiah Masoli after he had been kicked out of Oregon. Read Stewart Mandel's take here.
Leslie Miles, LSU - Gregg Doyel thinks Les is a bad guy. Normally I'm not one to agree with Doyel but what he did to Elliot Porter is inexcusable.
Lane Kiffin, USC - for being stupid enough to take the USC job knowing sanctions were pending and for the way he handled leaving Tennessee.
Derek Dooley, Tennessee - Sticking with the Tenn theme - and some of the blame for this probably goes to Kiffin as well given that they were his recruits but still any head coach should be able to step in and convince his kids that starting a bar brawl and knocking a police officer unconscious is not a good idea.
Rich Rodriguez, Michigan - While still being investigated for secondary NCAA violations at Michigan, the NCAA announced that they were now also investigating charges that he committed similar violations while at WVU. All this after leading Michigan to a horrendous 8-16 mark the last two seasons. He'd better surpass the 8 win mark this season alone if he wants to be around for year four.
Any other nominations? Post them in the comment section and let's discuss!
Sunday, September 5, 2010
The Zook Awards Bylaws
Each week, we will accept nominations throughout the weekend for the most incompetent coaching performances of the week. The nominations may include youtube videos or links to illustrate how bad the coaching was and discussion will take place in the comments section. Every Wednesday, we will announce the winner(s) for that week.
- There may be 1 or 2 co-winners. These coaches will receive 10, 8, or 6 points depending on how incompetent they were. Automatic winners must receive at least 8 points. There may also be 1 or 2 runners-up (for a total of no more than 3 coaches) that receive 3 or 4 points each. An unlimited number of runners-up may receive 1 point each provided there is general consensus that they are Zookworthy. Note that it is not necessary to lose a game to be considered for a Zook Award.
- There is an exception made to the above when there are more than 2 automatic winners in a given week (see below). There can be as many automatic winners as that week's games warrant. The automatic winners are determined by the clauses listed below.
- Mississippi State clause: The Mississippi State clause states that if a coach is fired as the direct result of the game, he is an automatic winner that week. [Until the end of 2007, this clause also stated that a coach was an automatic winner if they coached a major team to a loss at the hands of Mississippi State. This part of the clause was to be rescinded if/when MSU turned their program around which they did by going 8-5 and winning a bowl game in 2007. Congratulations Coach Croom! We wish you the best of luck in the future!]. Origin of clause: Mississippi State 38, Florida 31, Oct 23, 2004. MSU was ranked #117 out of 117 teams in the computers, having lost to 1-AA Maine earlier in the season. Zook was finally fired the following Monday.
- Out-Zooked clause: The Out-Zooked clause states that if you coach a game so poorly that you are upset by a Ron Zook coached team, then you are an automatic winner that week. Note that this would not include a 1-AA team which would presumably be an underdog to Illinois but only teams that were favored against Zook. Origin of clause: Illinois 23, Michigan State 20, Sept 30, 2006. Michigan State was 3-1 and favored by 26 points. Instead they gave Illinois its first Big 10 win since 2004 (worst of all at home). After the game, Zook's "classy" Illini players started a brawl with the Spartans by trying to plant their flag at the 50 yard line. Eventually, Michigan State finished the season 4-8 and John L. Smith was fired on Nov 1.
- Jeff Bowden clause: The Jeff Bowden clause states that you are an automatic winner if your inept gameplan leads a traditional powerhouse to get blown and and shut out or otherwise completely embarrassed at home. Origin of clause: Wake Forest 30, FSU 0, Nov 11, 2006. At 8-1 entering the game, it wouldn't have shocked a lot of people that Wake won but no one expected powerhouse FSU to lay a goose egg, especially given that Wake's 4 ACC wins that season had been by a combined 17 total points. Days later, Jeff Bowden was forced to resign as offensive coordinator.
- Hawkins-Carr clause: The Hawkins-Carr clause states that if you lead a top 25 school or otherwise traditional power to an upset at the hands of a 1-AA team (or even a very lowly rated 1-A team), you are an automatic winner for that week. Note that this would not include a poorly rated 1-A team such as Duke or Vanderbilt losing to a 1-AA team. Origins of clause: Montana State 19, Colorado 10, Sept 2, 2006 and Appalachian State 34, Michigan 32, Sept 1, 2007. Colorado was coming off a Big XII north championship and had high expectations for incoming new head coach Dan Hawkins at the time. Hawkins has been on the hot seat ever since. Even that was nothing compared to the shocker that App State pulled on Michigan in the season opener of Lloyd Carr's final season. This game is the only time a division 1-AA team has ever beaten a team ranked in the AP poll, much less a team that was in the top 5.
- Bowl Game Award Presented By Larry Coker: Each year, one Zook Award will be given out for the entire bowl season. This special award has been named in honor of Larry Coker and his stunning 40-3 blowout loss to an LSU team without their starting QB. Coker's Miami players subsequently started a brawl in the tunnel with the LSU players.
- The Lane Kiffin Preseason Award: Starting in 2009, we hand out a preseason award for the coach with the biggest display of incompetence in the preseason. It is named after inaugural winner Lane Kiffin who displayed an unnatural level of ignorance of NCAA rules while unnecessarily making false slanderous statements about opposing coaches that resulted in violations against his own program and him having to issue public apologies to the opposing coaches.
- Postgame Comment Bonus: If a coach compounds a Zookworthy performance by making a complete idiot out of himself at the post-game press conference, they can be awarded an additional point. Examples: "Rex was open", "We've got a long way to go, but we're close.", "I felt like they [Tenn] thought we were gonna try to get points.", or Tommy Bowden throwing his starting QB Cullen Harper under the bus or ridiculously claiming that he'd never had a team block a kick against him before or actually asking Nick Saban for coaching advice after getting his ass kicked by Saban's Bama team.
The Zook Awards: History and Qualifications
The Zook awards started after Clemson's Sept 24th, 2005 loss to BC when I remarked to Gavin and Forrest that Tommy Bowden had won the Ron Zook Award of the week for absolutely blowing a game we should have won with terrible playcalling and decision making in the fourth quarter. However, the award was given out prematurely as Les Miles of LSU Zooked it big time against Tennessee the following Monday night, blowing a 21-point lead to a Tennessee team that ended up finishing the season 5-6. And so the weekly tradition of recognizing incompetence in college football coaching began...
Qualifications for winning the Zook Award
Now let's look at reasons you may be nominated for the Zook Award each week:
1. Playing a soft prevent defense to pull defeat from the jaws of certain victory late in the 4th quarter (see: UF vs Miami 2003, UF vs. Ole Miss 2003, UF vs. FSU 2003, UF vs. Tenn 2004, UF vs. Ole Miss 2004, UF vs. LSU 2004, and UF vs. Miss St 2004).
2. Giving up special teams or otherwise stupid scores
3. Coaching a talented team to a terrible loss against a vastly inferior opponent. For example, getting blown out at home by an unranked opponent (see UF vs. LSU 2002). Also going 0-for the state of Mississippi (see UF vs. Ole Miss 2003, 2004; UF vs. Miss St. 2004). Losing to the team ranked #117 out of 117 teams in division I-A -- a team that lost to a division I-AA team (see UF vs. Miss St. 2004). Or even a narrow escape if the opponent is bad enough (having to come back from down 17 in the second half to beat Kentucky ... in football).
4. Having a playbook so predictable that everyone in the stands, not to mention the opposing team, knows which play is being run simply by looking at the offensive formation.
5. Completely tanking in a bowl game.
In the 2005 Peach Bowl, Larry Coker of Miami turned in a textbook example of how to Zook a bowl game.
6. Pure stupidity
7. Complete lack of control over players.
Qualifications for winning the Zook Award
Now let's look at reasons you may be nominated for the Zook Award each week:
1. Playing a soft prevent defense to pull defeat from the jaws of certain victory late in the 4th quarter (see: UF vs Miami 2003, UF vs. Ole Miss 2003, UF vs. FSU 2003, UF vs. Tenn 2004, UF vs. Ole Miss 2004, UF vs. LSU 2004, and UF vs. Miss St 2004).
2. Giving up special teams or otherwise stupid scores
- Example1 : UF vs. Tenn 2003. With Florida leading 3-0 just before halftime, Zook decides to run the ball on first down. On 2nd down instead of taking a knee so UF can go into halftime with the lead, Zook decides to throw and try to pick up the first down. He then turns around and runs a draw play on third-and-long allowing Tennessee to use their last timeout to stop the clock and get the ball back with enough time for a 50-yard hail mary. When asked after the game about the play calls, Zook responded "We thought we'd try to get some more points before halftime". When further questioned as to why then did he run the ball on 1st and 3rd downs, Zook said "We felt that they thought we were going to try to get some points..." Yes, he thought they thought he thought ...
- Example 2: UF vs. S. Carolina 2003. Florida is punting on the last play of the first half with the lead. Instead of simply punting the ball out of bounds and going to the locker room, they decide to kick it right to S. Carolina's most dangerous return man, who returns the punt for a TD.
3. Coaching a talented team to a terrible loss against a vastly inferior opponent. For example, getting blown out at home by an unranked opponent (see UF vs. LSU 2002). Also going 0-for the state of Mississippi (see UF vs. Ole Miss 2003, 2004; UF vs. Miss St. 2004). Losing to the team ranked #117 out of 117 teams in division I-A -- a team that lost to a division I-AA team (see UF vs. Miss St. 2004). Or even a narrow escape if the opponent is bad enough (having to come back from down 17 in the second half to beat Kentucky ... in football).
4. Having a playbook so predictable that everyone in the stands, not to mention the opposing team, knows which play is being run simply by looking at the offensive formation.
5. Completely tanking in a bowl game.
- Example 1: UF vs. Michigan 2003. With Heisman runner-up Rex Grossman leading Florida down the field in a sustained drive late in the 4th quarter, Zook decides that it is the perfect time to have freshman cornerback Vernell Brown take a pitch back and attempt to throw the ball back to Grossman. Brown retreated about 20 yards and heaved up a high floater with a man in his face, which was predictably intercepted to seal the Michigan victory. When asked about the play, Zook's comment was "Rex was open."
- Example 2: UF vs. Iowa 2004. In a game in which ESPN analysts said beforehand that Iowa had no business being in due to the huge talent difference between the teams, Florida was completely blown out right from the start. After the game, ESPN analysts commented that Kirk Ferentz outcoached Ron Zook in every single phase of the game.
In the 2005 Peach Bowl, Larry Coker of Miami turned in a textbook example of how to Zook a bowl game.
6. Pure stupidity
- Example 1: Running to the wrong sideline when coming out of the tunnel at a UF-UGA game.
- Example 2: After offsetting personal foul penalties on Florida and Vanderbilt, Ron Zook declined the penalty on Vanderbilt, giving the Commodores 15 yards of field position.
- Example 3: Trying to throw the ball against the worst run defense in the conference (Kentucky 2004) followed the next week by trying to run the ball against the worst pass defense in the country (Ole Miss 2004). Zook stated "Just because they didn't do well against the pass last week doesn't mean they won't be better this week." The previous week, Ole Miss had gotten torched for over 660 passing yards!
- Example 4: After Ben Troupe had carried Florida's offense (and literally many Ole Miss defenders) for the first half with nearly 100 receiving yards including a TD where he dragged three defenders into the endzone, Zook did not call a pass thrown in Troupe's direction the entire second half.
7. Complete lack of control over players.
- Example 1: A couple of days before a big game vs. Tennessee (a game they subsequently Zooked), a group of players leave practice to start a fight with some fraternity members. Ron Zook instead of punishing his players, proceeds to threaten the fraternity members himself.
- Example 2: One player threw a half-full keg at a student's head yet was still on the team. Another was arrested multiple times yet was never removed from the team.
- Example 3: Players have been quoted as saying they didn't try under Zook because there was an attitude of it didn't matter if you win or not.
Time for a reboot
Somehow the blog got deleted by google during the offseason so I think this marks a good time for a reboot of the Zook Awards. Luckily I have almost all of the previous award winners saved and will be reposting them but I also think its time to change things up a little bit.
First, we are going to be adding polls so readers can vote and we can include links to youtube highlights (or lowlights actually) of the games we are discussing. Second, we are going to move away from the old system of just 3 points for a win, 1 point for a runner-up.
The new system will still allow for 1 or 2 winners and 1 or 2 runners up (for a total of no more than 3 coaches) but we will now be listing an unlimited number of honorable mentions. This way a coach who is consistently very bad but just not quite the worst every week will get his fair share of recognition and points. The points system will also be more flexible because not all incompetent coaching performances are created equal. The winner can receive either 10, 8, or 6 points depending on how bad he Zooked up the game. The runners-up can receive 3 or 4 points and the honorable mentions will receive 1 point each.
I'll be reposting the Zook Awards history, qualifications, and by-laws and kicking off this week's round of nominations shortly!
First, we are going to be adding polls so readers can vote and we can include links to youtube highlights (or lowlights actually) of the games we are discussing. Second, we are going to move away from the old system of just 3 points for a win, 1 point for a runner-up.
The new system will still allow for 1 or 2 winners and 1 or 2 runners up (for a total of no more than 3 coaches) but we will now be listing an unlimited number of honorable mentions. This way a coach who is consistently very bad but just not quite the worst every week will get his fair share of recognition and points. The points system will also be more flexible because not all incompetent coaching performances are created equal. The winner can receive either 10, 8, or 6 points depending on how bad he Zooked up the game. The runners-up can receive 3 or 4 points and the honorable mentions will receive 1 point each.
I'll be reposting the Zook Awards history, qualifications, and by-laws and kicking off this week's round of nominations shortly!
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